My name is Layla, I am thirteen years old, and I was born with a genetic mutation (COMT) that causes adrenal dysfunction and two genetic mutations (MTHFR) that don’t allow my brain to get rid of neurotoxins so they build up in my system. My symptoms make it look like I have extreme mental health disorders, but I truly don’t. Psychiatric medicine did not and may not help me. But we didn’t know this until I went to see a naturopath doctor this summer. I have been to a lot of doctors and no one could help me. They just gave me lots of pills but I didn’t get better. Here is what it felt like for me when my head would start spinning:
I start to fidget, by constantly poking people or cracking my knuckles or even pulling out my eyelashes. I drive my family insane when I do things like this; but I HAVE to do things like that. I can’t help it, I can’t make it stop.
That’s just the beginning. I begin to pick fights or accuse people of weird things they would never do, but I believe that they did. I can’t take “no” for an answer if I want something when my head starts spinning. If they do say no, I get extremely upset. My parents could say no to a treat, or no to a friend coming over because we are too busy. They could tell me to clean my room. But no matter what, it would just escalate from there and turn into a screaming match. My parents wouldn’t do anything right, according to me. There would be ‘I hate you’s,’ suicidal thoughts, cussing, and even violence. Sometimes, my parents had to sit on me so I wouldn’t hurt them or myself. All because I couldn’t eat chocolate ice cream.
My parents would be able to calm me down for a little while, but the ‘cycle’ would start back up again in either the next few minutes or the next day. No matter what, I had to get this fight in me, out. The longer I held it in, the more mean and intense the next fight would be, on my part. I would fight and scream for hours on end, to the point of making my younger siblings cry…afraid, in their rooms.
Of course, I would feel a little remorse after I had exploded and finished, but it would always happen again the next day. I hated it. I hated ripping my family apart like that. But fighting that way, always made me feel better after I got it out of my system.
There were a few years there where I felt like I would never get help. All the doctors and therapists I went to didn’t help me. I even moved away to live somewhere else to get mental health treatment. Those doctors re-diagnosed me with a bunch of psychiatric disorders but they were all wrong. I came home and was just as bad off as when I left. I felt pretty hopeless. I would never fit in with my friends. I would rip my family to shreds, not literally. I love my family, and I hated myself. I still do sometimes, but its getting better.
We decided to try something different since regular doctors weren’t helping. One of my family members mentioned a naturopathic doctor to my mother. My mom agreed and was excited to try it out. I felt like nothing could help me, but I decided to try just one more thing. If this naturopathic doctor didn’t help, I don’t know what I would do. I did food allergy tests, a genetic test, and cortisol test. Weeks later, we got our results.
We discovered that I have severely low cortisol levels, so bad I couldn’t even see the little line on the graph. My genetic testing told us about the genetic mutations (COMT & MTHFR) that explain all of my symptoms. I have to eat a special diet, take lots of folate, and I take natural remedies to raise my cortisol levels. So, when I eat a hot dog, it has so many chemicals such as nitrate in it that I go insane and have another fight with my parents BECAUSE OF THE FOOD THAT I ATE. If my cortisol is too low, my body tries to kick itself into fight or flight so that I can get the cortisol flow that I need to be able to think and go about my day.
But now, things are changing. I feel so much better than I have in a very very long time. I am almost off of all those strong pills that the psychiatrists wanted me to take that didn’t help. I don’t really need them! I don’t have psychiatric problems, I have what my mom says are metabolic problems and physical reasons for those problems. Those things are getting fixed and I am getting better.
I am telling my story because I feel like if parents and even other adults read this, it can inspire them to try out different things to help their kids and/or themselves, and never lose hope. Maybe they have a genetic reason why they are depressed or anxious or have other mental health problems that medicine doesn’t help.
Never lose hope.
There are answers out there.
Sometimes you have to look in new places and you find answers you don’t expect.
For more information on MTHFR mutations below is a free resource on Amazon: